Its been 6 weeks since I delivered my second child - JX. I feel a strong gush of love spreading through my body as I glazed into my newborn bb JX asleep in my arms. I cuddle and hold him close as I tell him gently I will love him forever and give him the best I can. I breastfeed him day and night which brings me endless joy as I watch him suckle on my breast to sleep... humming along a lullaby..
Envious of me right now? Too bad all those are just sentences that I dream and wish I feel this way right now.. In Reality...
I am struggling like an octopus as I have to handle boy boy JH and JX. I am breastfeeding JX round the clock like a cow and its driving me crazy.. I can't wait to put baby on the bed the moment he falls asleep on my arm so I can catch some sleep myself or do other stuffs.. I struggle to control my frustration of being alone at home when I have to deal with JX's crying.. Lucky thing JH is in childcare during the day or I will definitely go mad and start pulling my hair.
Learning to be mum again to a newborn is no easy task. YES its very true different baby has different personality and it doesn't mean you will know what to do when its your second child. Maybe I sound like I don't love my baby.. But I guess Im still struggling with alot of other things and bb JX and I are still at the getting to know one another stage so its kinda hard for me to enjoy him as much as I wish..
Im learning to breastfeeding again and trying to know his feeding pattern and preference. JX's hobby is on and off snacking of my breast and sucking for comfort.. and sometimes its driving me crazy! Had nightmare of having both sore and bleeding nipples within a week and having mastitis (Im sure its a nightmare of every breastfeeding mothers out there!) within a month! Thoughts of giving up breastfeeding is on my mind whenever Im clueless about his feeding pattern and having those pain. Its a miracle Im still persevering to breastfeed JX!!
One school of thought mentioned that you shouldn't let baby suckle on your breast for comfort. Must train baby to take one full feed. Be firm and tell baby not to fall asleep when nursing him and must tell him to finish a full feed then go sleep.
Another school of thought claim that it is alright for baby to comfort suck as it will help calm them down and establish a bond between mother and child which is crucial during the early stage of their life. Snacking habit can also help to establish milk supply of mummy. You can go this website kellymom.com if you are interested to read more...
So who should I follow? Perhaps I should just go with my instinct and play by ear afterall I am the mother of my baby and I know him best with him sticking to my breast day and night.
Would like to hear from other breastfeeding mothers out there on how they cope and share your stories with me so I know Im not alone...
Hopefully I can have time like now every once in a while to update this blog..